Three Pages

I have a rule about writing.

Three pages, a minimum, every day. I give myself one day off to not do it. But every other day, three pages, this includes weekends, and the kicker, they HAVE to be 'relevant' pages, to the story I'm writing.

So, I'm 12 chapters in. I reckon (Yes, I said I Reckon) I have five or six more chapters to go to 'finish' the story, of course, there are five or six chapters I'll be adding in when I do the rewrite (I so can not believe some of the detail I left out, LOTS of detail, but then, this IS the first draft and I AM just trying to get the story down and it IS flowing, and isn't that something?) I am actually unsure as to what other writers do, being as I don't know any others, but I read that Laurell K Hamilton SWEARS that you don't rewrite until the full story is down or you'll never finish a book.
Another author swears that you rewrite as you go, or you won't go where the story properly wants to take you.

I've tried both, and it seems I'm in the 'get the story down than make it pretty' camp.

And why am I telling you this?

Why, I'm telling you this because it's 8:23 p.m. at night, and I have yet to write my three pages, and I am loathe to, (I am a morning writer, truly, but today, I went and did mom/housewife errands) but I am determined and bound to a promise to myself that I would write three pages every day.

Yes, A promise to myself. I promised myself something that requires a lot of me to me. How funny, that i am doing this. But I promised myself that I wouldn't sit and not try to write a novel. And to write a novel one requires mass amounts of discipline, so I promised myself that no matter what, I would be disciplined, and write at least three pages a day. I promised myself that I wouldn't let myself down.

Myself is very happy, because myself feels that I truly mean it. And I am writing these three pages though all I want to do is drown myself in the naughty King Henry the VIII show, The Tudors, (Dynasty, only with History!) or the Other Boleyn Girl novel. But I made a promise to Myself and by golly, I mean to keep it.

But here's the thing that has me spooked.

I made a promise to Myself, and I am keeping it, so Myself will be happy. Myself is THRILLED that I'm going to write the three pages. I am struggling to do so, but, again, don't want to disappoint Myself, even though I'd rather be goofing off... Myself is nagging me because of what I said.

So, between Myself and I, who the heck-n-crap is Me?

ahhhh

Secret Life of a Soccer Mom

Someone sign me up for it.

I see it as a cheap way to get a job.

I can talk about some crazy dream of mine to be an executive of a publishing company or something.

At the end of the week, I will give a tear-felt speech to my family, whereby I tell them how much I love them, but that frankly, their appreciation of me has been a bit on the down-side, and it was time for us all to fly the nest.
Mommy will go to her new job, Turbo and Bear can go to daycare, I've already researched a couple of them, and Drama Girl will get her own key to let herself in after school.
Hubby McRed will take dinner duty three times a week.

I will cry, and sniffle, and then go take whatever job I was offered... and since it won't be the glamorous job portrayed on the television, I will stay there only long enough to get a better paying job somewhere else...

...would that be wrong?

Spring Break

In the past, spring break, you think

beaches
bikinis
beer
bummy kids

Okay, you still sorta think of it, because lets face it, it still means that, however,

In the new world of adult education, and the influx of adults who hold jobs while going to school, or while tending demon ferret monkey offspring, (post coming) spring break now means...

laundry getting done
no homework and class time at 9 p.m. when the kids are finally in bed
an actual dinner on the table
an hour in front of the idiot tube
two hours with a book you're reading FOR FUN
sheer giddiness and delight from the prospect of not having to deal with school

But, alas, no beaches.

Not for me.

And, I'm a bit sad about that.

What, it's only Wednesday?

I'm coming 'down' from my paper trauma.

It's in, and now I can fret about the grade and nasty mean comments I'll get, never mind my personal thoughts on the class... just... want...pain.... to....cease.... but.....still....get....degree....

My group in my other class, well, Abbot and Costello.

The upside?

I'm taking the night off :) and writing chapter nine and ordering pizza and not cooking and not thinking about school.

:)

The downside?

School makes me grumpy, and papers make me fretty, which make me eat ice cream.

Upside?

I saw Tulips sprouting on the way to pick up Drama Girl from school, which means SPRING IS COMING AND IT WILL BE WARM.

Downside?

Snow on Friday. WHAT?

:)

Look! I'm Procrastinating!

What am I doing?

Why, Procrastinating!

I am on the last bit of the first and most likely final draft of a paper I have drawn out for three days.

This is my last semester of class, and it is...toooorrrttuuuureee... because it just so happens, I decided, during the second to last semester of class, that while a masters in mgt. is handy, the PR sub-section of that degree is not, because during the second to last semester of class, I decided I most likely probably never want to work in PR.

So this paper is pure torture because it represents, a, a paper on a topic the teacher doesn't understand or care about, b, the second to last paper for this class and c, i didn't do so smackin' hot on the first paper, and nervousness makes me procrastinate more....


ahhhh

so, i'm procrastinating....

An insight into game drama

For those who think games is free of the gossip, drama, and the sort of petty goings ons that afflict other creative industries,

I give you snorehammer.

Skip down to all the comments, and you'll see the sort of love that goes on in the community. It is very hard to out-rantxor a master rantxor, and those in the gaming community are rant masters. I myself only dream of the rant ability of community game posters.

For those who for some reason would think that those in games, the gaming industry, and the gaming community, are above it, well, I mean, we're talking games here, what did you expect?

But before you click, let me clarify some things...

a) Everyone hates WoW because it's currently the biggest, baddest most successful game out there, and nobody is near toppling it currenlty.

b) Everyone hates WoW, but because it is currently the biggest, baddest most successful game out there, everyone is playing it.

c) The people that aren't playing it, are rare.

d) this is not a cheap ploy to get more viewers by linking to a well-viewed site. I can't maintain a blog with more than five readers as it is.

e) I don't play mmo's anymore. I would LIKE to. I enjoy them. I think they are fun. I just don't have the time.

f) I do not have the knowledge to either agree or disagree with whether or not the game is good, because I don't have the time to play the games, and it's not out yet.

g) Yes, I know people who work on it. They all say it's good. Except the angry bitter ones. Who say it's bad. We'll never really know until it comes out. Or I play it. Re, time.

h) I don't actually expect anyone to go through and READ the comments, I just did to admire the rant masters at work.

i) I'm on the 9th letter of the alphabet, and I just realized this post is super dull.

AW, shucks

You guys are so nice! bout my writing!

I now make it a rule that monday through friday I can not go to bed til I've written three pages, excluding my babbling journal writing (which will never ever see the light of the day).

But on to my DOOM TOPIC

SCCCHOOOOL.


This is the final semester FOREVER (I am pretty certain I'm going to bail on the MBA, but my husband, a few friends, and my sister think I'll regret it) ANYHOW.... I'm in my LAST SEMESTER OF MY MASTER'S PROGRAM.... my LAST TWO CLASSES...

and they are the freakin' hardest two classes ever.... like, both instructors are insane. They are like, Oh, so you are about to graduate, you think huh? None of my other classes have been this insanely difficult.

I'm slightly proud to say that one of the 4.0 GPA students in my group is going to 'discuss' our crappy group grade with our professor since it was b.s. But even aside from that, the classes are JUST HARD> ARGH.

And... I am so not in the mood... just end it... ahhhh I...just....want...to.....pass....

it's not like this degree is giving me ANY help in getting a job, anyhow! SHEESH!

And that, folks, is my school rant.

On Writing

I've been writing a consistent three pages a day for two weeks.

I have lots of writing to show it. I SHOULD be posting this on my 'writing' blog, but, alas, no one reads that one ha ha ha. And all five of you, well, I want you to share my giddiness at actually having the discipline to write three pages a day.

Go Me!

One day, I will have something to send out to an agent, so I too, can enter the world of 'unpublished writers' vs 'aspiring writers' though TECHNICALLY because all my jobs were 'writing' jobs, I'm actually an unemployed writer who is working on her own material in hopes of being published, and thus, employed.

Or something.

Ax Men, Really?

Okay,

I FELL for the crab fisherman show.
I was intrigued by Ice Road Truckers.

But....

Ax Men?

As in.... Loggers? Lumberjacks? Tree choppers?

I mean, it's an honest craft. I'm not saying it's easy, or safe.

But...

Ax Men?

Top 20, Bottom 10

I totally stole this from More Gravy.

More Gravy has been blogging more because she just had another baby, and finds herself frequently trapped under her laptop, baby, and baby-mauling toddler.

But hey, I stole it, yes, what can I say, when it comes to blogs, I have no creativity. Strange, considering I'm a writer.

Top 20: in no real order

1. My kids, yeah blah blah.
2. Fitting into my one pair of size 8 jeans because it's a 'skinny' day.
3. Dr. Who, Torchwood and BSG.
4. Clean laundry room with actual clean laundry
5. Long bubbly baths
6. Early bed time for the pre-schoolers
7. Coffee and chocolate biscotti
8. Tea and tea cookies
9. Shopping by myself
10. Buffy Nostalgia (followed by Angel Nosalgia which reawakens Buffy nostalgia, it's a cycle)
11. British Comedy
12. Being home with the boys the first four (probably five) years
13. Running around the track with the boys.
14. Reading quietly while Drama Girl reads quietly
15. Waking up early enough to have coffee without interuption
16. Library trip without the kids
17. Spring weather in February
18. A good book
19. Realizing your friend across the country is on Aim at midnight and you can chat
20. Sleeping

Bottom twelve, in no particular order-- it would have been ten, but the cat required more than one slot

1. Cellulite and 'jelly belly"
2. Looking for a job after not working for five years
3. The eternal last semester of school
4. Fighting children
5. Realizing Drama Girl hasn't done her homework in a week
6. Stategically placed cat throw up
7. Cat throw up used as a Statement by the Cat
8. Knowing the cat secretly likes Hubby McRed better
9. The fake tree in my living room
10. Doing work that I may never actually get any income from
11. Lack of good television on Thursday nights
12. How fast my eyebrows grow in

Torchwood

Right, I get why I love watching Dr. Who.

But someone please, PLEASE tell me why I can't stop watching Torchwood.

It's such an unlikely show to like, and the 'in the commercial break' explanatory interviews drive me nuts. Do they NEED to explain each plot, or character development technique? ARGH.

Yet, here I sit, watching Torchwood, and heaven forbid, if I miss it, I watch the repeat.

What, I'm not compatible with Wolverine? WTF?

So,

This is my comic hero match?

I mean, not Wolverine? Or, like, Batman?
I get a half cyborg?
I mean, he's got potent, def, but not Wolverine?

Now go find yours!

Elizabeth the Golden Age

The one thing about On-Demand is occasionally, there's actually a move on it that I want to see.

I thought Elizabeth, the Golden Age, was one of them.
Queen Elizabeth is one of my favorite, strong female role models.

Oh I don't buy into the 'Virgin' Queen bit, I like to think she managed to sneak a guy into the sack every now and again, but that's just a minor thing, over the course of her life and accomplishments, I always admired her place in history, her politcal savvy, her smarts, etc etc etc.

So what does Elizabeth the Golden Age portray?

A love-struck woman who goes half mad over Sir Walter Raleigh, screeching in despair and loves lornless (is that even a word) throes while Spain is getting ready to attack. She cries, she whines, she pouts, and she needs a strong man to set her straight. WHAT! WHAT! Sir Walter Raleigh is the man that sets her straight? WHAT?

Oh what a nice way to take a strong woman and turn her into a wretched whiny bitter loveless hag of a shrew.

I despised that movie.

Oh, and on TOP of that, to make it worse, they put her on horseback looking like an elfin queen from the Tolkien films rather than an actual Queen.

So my review for Elizabeth the Golden Age is..... bleeeaahhhh

Have you Checked Your Kids Math

So,

tonight, lets talk about fuzzy math. Math for people who hate math. Math that involves lots of 'in the ballparks, guesstimates, and concepts' rather tahn 2 + 2 is 4 and 2 * 2 is 4.

My Drama Girl is ADHD, with some unidentified learning disorder in math, which I'm beginning to suspect may be Fuzzy Mathitis. For years, she's been doing awful in math, and has been part of special math groups of other students who do horrible.

She came home the other day.
"How is school."
"Fine," she says, with the excitement of a canned sardine.

"How is Math?"
"Oh math? Math is good. It's easy now."
pause
Check Pulse
"It is?"
"Yeah, we are doing it a new way now."
"Really?"
"Yeah."

She then proceeds to pull out a math sheet, and perform.... MULTIPLICATION problems... the OLD WAY, the computational way, that we all learned when we were younger.

Same with division.

I am an anti new math person. I admit it.
Save the conceptualization, concepts, abstractions of math for the kids who are older. That stuff will come, but it won't come if they don't know their basic facts!

Just a thought.

Before 19-0

Okay so

The Big Game is here, and now, we take a break from the beloved sport for... politics.

Senate looking into Spygate
Posted: Friday February 01, 2008 06:05AM ET
The ranking Republican on the Senate Judiciary Committee wants NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell to explain why the league destroyed evidence related to spying by the Patriots. Senator Arlen Specter, Republican of Pennsylvania and ranking member of the committee, said that Goodell would eventually be called before the committee to address two issues: the league's antitrust exemption in relation to its television contract and the destruction of the tapes that revealed spying by the Patriots.

Now, which is the bigger issue here? And what did they not say? Oh, that the Senator is heavily backed by Comcast? No wait, the REAL issue is the league's antitrust exemption. Isn't the destruction of the tapes an internal matter within the NFL, especially since the team, and the coach, has already been fined?

Don't get me wrong, I think the spygate thing was a shame, however, I don't believe it did anything except piss the Patriots off enough to go 18-0, possibly 19-0. I don't believe it gave them an unbelievable advantage, and I'm not convinced they were the only team to do it. But, saying that, why, WHY did he destroy the tapes? I don't know. Frankly, I don't even care. It wasn't the Patriots that destroyed the tapes, it was the NFL Commissioner. I just hope it doesn't come back on the Pats heads.

Because really, I just want to watch football. And really, I'm tired of everyone hating the Patriots just because they won too much. It's not that they won too much, really, though, it's that it's not YOUR team that won that much. To which everyone yells OOOH SPYGATE, but, that doesn't explain 18-0. I read an article that says Spygate made the Pats 18-0 because of all the crap they got for doing something that, I dont think, significantly made a difference in their game.

Regardless, I just want to watch the last game of the season, and potentially the biggest game in NFL history with a potential 19-0 undefeated team, without hearing people talk about how nice it would be if Brady got hurt. Now, that there's real sportsmanship. OH MY, a team is WINNING and FABULOUS, lets hurt them? Ugh.

Quick Notes

Yes,

I did finish that second draft of that story I wrote, and now, I think it truly is vomit, but from what I understand, that is normal. I put it away and will look at it next week.

Yes,

I did write an actual OUTLINE of the first book of a planned-three-book-but-wouldn't-it-be-nice-if-it-were-ten-published-books series, and plan to start the first chapters sometime next week.

No,

I did not help Drama Girl with the fifth grade science project paper due tomorrow, and will have to finish it and send it Monday.

No,

I did not work today, like I planned, so I'll have to work tomorrow, which is Friday, and Work on Friday is a personal no-no for me, so I'm very sad about today's laziness. I wanted to be lazy tomorrow dammit.

Yes,
I suffer absurd writers angst.

Yes,
I am secretly hoping Hubby McRed's stepmother doesn't stop by because it will interfere with my normal Friday night Sci-Fi Fest.

That's It!

Yes I did - -Vicks Rocks (vaporrub)

Vicks Vapor Rubs Rocks

And it's now smothering my four year old's chest.

I got him when he was sleeping muahahahhaha.

I'm in the Vicks Rubs Rocks camp. My husband firmly in the Anti-Vick's camp.

But whatever it's value or worth, it DOES clear the sinuses at the very least....

The suffering woes of a blog

My poor blog, neglected these ten days.

My temp gig is going good. I'd LOVE it to be a permanent gig, but one never knows.

I'm doing my own writing again, a lovely story that is becoming more ironic horror than anything else. I was going for comedic horror, but that's really hard to do. It's only a short story, because the idea is basically how a character develops into something else entirely, and that can be done in short story form. I've never done this genre before, so it'll be interesting.

Also, I am working on another story that is a book. By working on, I mean, creating characters and history, so when I go down to write, it'll flow better. There's a lot of stuff that goes into that book, and while I would love to just sit down and write it, without the prep work I don't think I could.

Now, what I REALLY need is my sons to play upstairs this well and for this long EVERY day at this time.

Well,

Tah!

Off to do dastardly, ghastly deeds in my story!

Boxer Boys

So.

I've found the solution to the pantless wonder boy problem I have.
My sons just don't keep pants on. At. All. I manage shorts, they'll keep shorts on longer than pants, but still, eventually, my little boys just toss them off and run around in little brief briefs.

Their underwear.

Then, eventually, Turbo will put his on backwards, and every time I see him, an image of Freddy Mercury pops into my head.

I had to stop this...

thus, boys boxer briefs.

Ala Boxers for Preschoolers.

These things are GREAT.

The boys love them. They are long enough that, with a shirt, I can pretend they are wearing shorts, and, when one puts them on backwards, there's no butt cheek sticking out.

So now the world knows.

My sons wear boxers.

How cool are they.

Out of the blue, blue

So, I've been handling my mom's passing away fairly well, I suppose, as well as anyone.

I mean, we had our last Mother's Day together, (don't even try to find me on mother's day this year, despite being a mother, I don't think I can quite handle the memory) watching Sarah Plain and Tall, which is now engraved in my memory, I was there with my sister and brothers all at the same time, so she got to see all her children one last time. I held her hand. I hugged her. I told her I loved her. She said the same. We smiled. She smiled so much when we were there. But she was so sick.

Anyhow. She passed away some time ago. In July, I suppose it was. Does it matter? It seems like she's been dying since last Easter (another holiday I may have to avoid this year -- it was Easter we got the awful news). I made it through the rest of the summer. I made it through my birthday in October. I made it through my daughter's, and my son's birthdays in November and December. I survived Thanksgiving. I beared Christmas, may have even given off the illusion of enjoying myself.

New Year's, however, did me in. I refused to celebrate it, to even acknowledge it, and went to bed at 10:30. I woke up New Year's Day, without the normal yearly Happy New Year phone call. My mother loved holidays, so you can forgive my scroogeness, because she made so many ordinary holidays so happy. So, New Years Day I woke up in a profound mood -- glad 2007 was over, but not really trusting 2008 to do me right. I made it through the day though, and the week, and now it's past midnight on Jan. 6, making it officially Monday, Jan 7, and I can't sleep because tonight, for no real reason whatsoever, I decided to terribly terribly miss my mom.

And I can't go to sleep because she is on my mind. And, not actually being alive, I can't do anything about it except sit here and miss her terribly. I would pull out a picture, except the image of her is ingrained in my mind, so there's no need.

I would normally express this awful dilemma to my brother, who is not online, because he's in bed, or my sister, who works in a lab at night, or even my brother-in-law, who knew how close we were to her, but no one is around, so, it's just the blog and I.