Thursday, May 10, 2007
Where I've Been
Yes, I've been missing in action lately.
I know I know, all five of you missed me.
I have just successfully finished another semester of my master's program. The last week was spent writing very long papers.
Also, it is now officially job hunting season. I hear we can hunt as many as we want, but we're only allowed to bag one.
I will be posting regulary again on Monday (I know you all just CAN NOT wait) but tomorrow I fly off to see my mother, who, as most of you know, is very ill with cancer. She's decided not to do chemo, so this is in a way, a good bye visit. I hope to cheer her up, and maybe, just maybe, get her thinking about her spiritual side. She's always been very religious and spiritual, but hasn't really, for some reason, been overly spiritual. She told me she just didn't think she was there yet, and I truly hope she does get there. She means the world to me, and I would like her to find some peace while she is here, rather than just waiting. We are all, her children and sisters, taking time to go and visit her in the next two months.
On that note, have a good weekend everyone. Wish my mother well, pray for her, if you're not the praying type, just take a moment to think of her. She's only 60, 61, so this is very hard.
Later all!
Sunday, April 29, 2007
NFL Draft
Well.
I don't care about the NFL draft. I don't, and I'm not following it, nor am I asking Hubby McRed who picked who and who went where.... I certainly didn't log in to NFL.com to figure out the details of the Raiders trade to NE.
New England gets Randy Moss... WOOOOT. However, I wish they would stop positioning New England as the team to make it to the Superbowl. It's how teams get cursed. I want New England to make it, so lets stop predicting they will and wait til the actual season starts. And, for the record, seeing as I'm a New England native, no, as a matter of fact, I did not jump on their bandwagon.... it's not my fault my team rocks.
Hubby McRed is deeply concerned with Dallas' picks, and can't believe that the Dolphins didn't pick up Quinn, because, duh, they need a quarterback.
Monday, April 23, 2007
What I got
Yes.
I got one.
I did.
On sale at Overstock.com.
And there was another 8% coupon which made it even nicer, with free shipping.
Some might think this is excessive, however, I am the vacuum destroyer.
We have to replace our vacuums every year and a half or two.
I need an UBAH VACUUMA
Because Hubby McRed is frakkin' sick and frakkin' tired of having to always blow a freakin' 150 bucks on a vaccum someone in the house (moi') is going to trash in less than a year and a half....
If I manage to destroy this one, we may just eliminate carpet in our house altogether....
I got one.
I did.
On sale at Overstock.com.
And there was another 8% coupon which made it even nicer, with free shipping.
Some might think this is excessive, however, I am the vacuum destroyer.
We have to replace our vacuums every year and a half or two.
I need an UBAH VACUUMA
Because Hubby McRed is frakkin' sick and frakkin' tired of having to always blow a freakin' 150 bucks on a vaccum someone in the house (moi') is going to trash in less than a year and a half....
If I manage to destroy this one, we may just eliminate carpet in our house altogether....
Thursday, April 19, 2007
Soy is Dangerous. Tofu, too!
It is with great joy that I discovered the benefits of soy protein were far outweighed by the dangers.
Thyroidism! Breast cancer! Hormonal imbalances! Early onset of puberty in girls! Slowed development in boys!
The verdict?
Forget soy. Forget tofu. Eat polenta and pasta. They even taste good! Diet Coke is healthier!
For the past two (yes, a whole two) days, after reading about how wonderful soymilk and tofu was, I decided to try it. See all those Silk commercials touting the health benefits of soy? One-sided. I tried some light soy milk. Bleah. The vanilla and chocolate is good though. I tried variations of tofu. Bland, but not bad, neither here nor there.
Then, because I couldn't fathom how to eat the recommended 25 grams of soy (on the back of the Silk box, I should have known better) I looked up the benefits of soy, to see if it was really worth all that.
Ummm.... nope. Read all about the controversy!
It's not just there, either. It's here... and then over here
Okay that last one was just for a laugh but still, this is more trusty...
And finally,the Wikipedia version.
So I think the occasional glass of soy milk (chocolate, or vanilla, but not plain ewww) and some tofu or miso is fine, but I think I won't be eating tempeh or soy burgers, or soy stuff... bleah.
If it doesn't include most of the soy bean and doesn't have soy protein then it's to be avoided, I think....
... and while I'll eat some soy, I'm not inclined to try to add it to my daily diet.
I'll just stock up on some olive oil and salmon.
Now, there's a combo you can't go wrong with.
Thyroidism! Breast cancer! Hormonal imbalances! Early onset of puberty in girls! Slowed development in boys!
The verdict?
Forget soy. Forget tofu. Eat polenta and pasta. They even taste good! Diet Coke is healthier!
For the past two (yes, a whole two) days, after reading about how wonderful soymilk and tofu was, I decided to try it. See all those Silk commercials touting the health benefits of soy? One-sided. I tried some light soy milk. Bleah. The vanilla and chocolate is good though. I tried variations of tofu. Bland, but not bad, neither here nor there.
Then, because I couldn't fathom how to eat the recommended 25 grams of soy (on the back of the Silk box, I should have known better) I looked up the benefits of soy, to see if it was really worth all that.
Ummm.... nope. Read all about the controversy!
It's not just there, either. It's here... and then over here
Okay that last one was just for a laugh but still, this is more trusty...
And finally,the Wikipedia version.
So I think the occasional glass of soy milk (chocolate, or vanilla, but not plain ewww) and some tofu or miso is fine, but I think I won't be eating tempeh or soy burgers, or soy stuff... bleah.
If it doesn't include most of the soy bean and doesn't have soy protein then it's to be avoided, I think....
... and while I'll eat some soy, I'm not inclined to try to add it to my daily diet.
I'll just stock up on some olive oil and salmon.
Now, there's a combo you can't go wrong with.
Wednesday, April 18, 2007
Bye Bye Baby
So we had three cats when we moved from Washington. But this house is laid out differently, and there is less room (until we finish the basement, but that's down the road) and the three cats hissed and fought and were not happy.
What do we do?
Nobody wanted the cat, even though everyone agreed he was wonderful (This right here is why I don't want to hear anything from people with the 'pets are forever' stories. When everyone is bloody miserable, something isn' working and it's not good for any of the pets. Also nobody wants your pet, they want to shop for their own. All the people that tell you they want your cat don't really, all the people you ask know people whom they are sure want it blah blah blah.) You can't just put it up on craigslist. Well, you can, but nasty, unpleasant things can happen to cats given to people on craigslist (PETA has a warning up). With the stuff with my mom going on, the constant cat dramatics and a berber carpet used as a scratching post, I couldn't spend months finding him a new home. So I took him to the humane society here, because happily, they don't euthanize their cats. In fact, unless the cat is seriously ill, he will stay there being fed, fat and happy until someone adopts him, which will not be long, since he's a big, fat, loveable, cuddleable, baby.
They asked why of the three cats we chose to give this one up. I said he didn't bond with anyone. (Also, if anyone would get adopted it would be him. I can't see anyone adopting my cat, who is so anxious and nervous that he throws up at the mere thought of change... twin birth, three days of yak. Car trip, peed on self in Nebraska. Attempt at dog, yak fest. Pet hotel here, shivering and shaking. I've had him for five years. I love his big eyes, I love his gray coat. I could do without the yakking. Then there's Drama's cat. Oh dear. Nobody but Drama girl likes this cat, though Hubby McRed sympathizes with her unique dislike of everyone, and her shyness and unwillingess to go near, oh, anyone else but Drama girl and occasionally Hubby McRed. So yes, nobody would be taking her, either, not to mention the severe emotional trauma taking the only, yes ONLY, pet that Drama girl ever had that actually liked her back would cause. (We are SOULMATES, she swears) The thing is, she really IS the only pet to return Drama Girl's affection. She sleeps at her head every night. She comes out for Drama girl. She plays with her hair. Drama girl pets her. She has a pink pet carrier in her room for her. Yes, that one could not, would not, must not go.
Which left the Biggest, Most Affectionate, Most Loveable, but for some reason, only cat that didn't bond with someone. Me personally, I think this family likes the outcasts, the outsiders, the problem children. We couldn't bond with Baby, his nickname, because he was, well, too good, too wonderful, too cuddly... how sad is that?
And what has happened the first night he left?
Nothing.
No cats chasing each other hissing across the house.
Drama girl's cat actually ventured into the open.
Everyone slept without having to wake up once to deal with a cat.
As I speak, Drama girl's cat is actually downstairs, eating, in the presence of another cat and myself.
Definitely I feel it was a case of the current environment not being able to hold three of them.
And yes, I am going to be pathetic and monitor his progress on their website to see if someone takes him.
What do we do?
Nobody wanted the cat, even though everyone agreed he was wonderful (This right here is why I don't want to hear anything from people with the 'pets are forever' stories. When everyone is bloody miserable, something isn' working and it's not good for any of the pets. Also nobody wants your pet, they want to shop for their own. All the people that tell you they want your cat don't really, all the people you ask know people whom they are sure want it blah blah blah.) You can't just put it up on craigslist. Well, you can, but nasty, unpleasant things can happen to cats given to people on craigslist (PETA has a warning up). With the stuff with my mom going on, the constant cat dramatics and a berber carpet used as a scratching post, I couldn't spend months finding him a new home. So I took him to the humane society here, because happily, they don't euthanize their cats. In fact, unless the cat is seriously ill, he will stay there being fed, fat and happy until someone adopts him, which will not be long, since he's a big, fat, loveable, cuddleable, baby.
They asked why of the three cats we chose to give this one up. I said he didn't bond with anyone. (Also, if anyone would get adopted it would be him. I can't see anyone adopting my cat, who is so anxious and nervous that he throws up at the mere thought of change... twin birth, three days of yak. Car trip, peed on self in Nebraska. Attempt at dog, yak fest. Pet hotel here, shivering and shaking. I've had him for five years. I love his big eyes, I love his gray coat. I could do without the yakking. Then there's Drama's cat. Oh dear. Nobody but Drama girl likes this cat, though Hubby McRed sympathizes with her unique dislike of everyone, and her shyness and unwillingess to go near, oh, anyone else but Drama girl and occasionally Hubby McRed. So yes, nobody would be taking her, either, not to mention the severe emotional trauma taking the only, yes ONLY, pet that Drama girl ever had that actually liked her back would cause. (We are SOULMATES, she swears) The thing is, she really IS the only pet to return Drama Girl's affection. She sleeps at her head every night. She comes out for Drama girl. She plays with her hair. Drama girl pets her. She has a pink pet carrier in her room for her. Yes, that one could not, would not, must not go.
Which left the Biggest, Most Affectionate, Most Loveable, but for some reason, only cat that didn't bond with someone. Me personally, I think this family likes the outcasts, the outsiders, the problem children. We couldn't bond with Baby, his nickname, because he was, well, too good, too wonderful, too cuddly... how sad is that?
And what has happened the first night he left?
Nothing.
No cats chasing each other hissing across the house.
Drama girl's cat actually ventured into the open.
Everyone slept without having to wake up once to deal with a cat.
As I speak, Drama girl's cat is actually downstairs, eating, in the presence of another cat and myself.
Definitely I feel it was a case of the current environment not being able to hold three of them.
And yes, I am going to be pathetic and monitor his progress on their website to see if someone takes him.
Tuesday, April 17, 2007
Deadliest Catch
What is so interesting about this show? I mean, technically, it's a 'guy' show so I shouldn't even be interested in it.
Men, on a ship, the Bering Sea, fishing for crab. The weather is usually bad. In one season, someone, at least someone, usually not on the ships that have the tv crews, will die. Someone will be injured (at least). A boat will get damaged. There will be a crazy storm (usually, once a show). The crab season only lasts like 23 days in October. It's an insane show. But me? Me? I'm addicted to it. I even have my favorite captains, and occasional crew member I bond with occasionally.
And I get cranky when I'm not caught up.
I'm not even a big tv person. I despise reality tv. Yet, here I am, catching up on the latest Deadliest Catch.....
Men, on a ship, the Bering Sea, fishing for crab. The weather is usually bad. In one season, someone, at least someone, usually not on the ships that have the tv crews, will die. Someone will be injured (at least). A boat will get damaged. There will be a crazy storm (usually, once a show). The crab season only lasts like 23 days in October. It's an insane show. But me? Me? I'm addicted to it. I even have my favorite captains, and occasional crew member I bond with occasionally.
And I get cranky when I'm not caught up.
I'm not even a big tv person. I despise reality tv. Yet, here I am, catching up on the latest Deadliest Catch.....
Friday, April 13, 2007
Nomination weeee
Momma's World has nominated my blog for two categories, humor and best parenting...
Please vote, peeerttty pleeeassee....
The adult content is language (I'm so scammin' off of Second Effort's post here, he was nominated, too... vote for him, as well!)
also, if you vote for me, and get your ten best friends to vote for me, you will have good luck for the next ten years, however, if you don't vote for me, or you do but only have seven best friends, and don't meet the ten best friend quota, you won't finish your taxes on time, and if you did finish your taxes on time, the IRS will lose them.....
Please vote, peeerttty pleeeassee....
The adult content is language (I'm so scammin' off of Second Effort's post here, he was nominated, too... vote for him, as well!)
also, if you vote for me, and get your ten best friends to vote for me, you will have good luck for the next ten years, however, if you don't vote for me, or you do but only have seven best friends, and don't meet the ten best friend quota, you won't finish your taxes on time, and if you did finish your taxes on time, the IRS will lose them.....
Wednesday, April 11, 2007
Robin Hood
Why I love the BBC.
In the BBC America's Robin Hood series, I love that:
Maid Marion can don a short bob, with bangs, and not cover it up. (She got her hair cut for helping poor people).
Maid Marion also practices Tai Chi, or some other relaxing form that didn't exist in England in 1192. She also never smiles. I suppose that would be realistic.
Robin Hood owns a hoodie. I adore hoodies. I want one just like his.
Robin Hood has a permanent scruff. Never a beard, never clean-shaven. It's a trick, to do that in 1192.
All the men, in fact, have neatly groomed scruffiness.
The Sheriff has heated floors in his castle, because he goes barefoot in them occasionally, while it's rainy and cold outside. Heated floors!
He also has the coolest loungewear.
Maid Marion can wear pants, too. Who knew maids wore pants.
Robin Hood has a nice ass, as seen in his tight leather britches.
Guy Gisbon is also a hottie, but he's a villian, a good villian, very villianous, he's so cute, then he kills someone randomly and how can you justify finding the villianous villian hot?
If I were 13, I'd have Robin Hood and his Merry Band of Boys plastered over my walls... yum.
Maid Marion can have Robin, but she's too grumpy. She's so wasting that ass. And apparently they have cute little shrugs back then too.
I'm sooo tired.
Night night folks.
In the BBC America's Robin Hood series, I love that:
Maid Marion can don a short bob, with bangs, and not cover it up. (She got her hair cut for helping poor people).
Maid Marion also practices Tai Chi, or some other relaxing form that didn't exist in England in 1192. She also never smiles. I suppose that would be realistic.
Robin Hood owns a hoodie. I adore hoodies. I want one just like his.
Robin Hood has a permanent scruff. Never a beard, never clean-shaven. It's a trick, to do that in 1192.
All the men, in fact, have neatly groomed scruffiness.
The Sheriff has heated floors in his castle, because he goes barefoot in them occasionally, while it's rainy and cold outside. Heated floors!
He also has the coolest loungewear.
Maid Marion can wear pants, too. Who knew maids wore pants.
Robin Hood has a nice ass, as seen in his tight leather britches.
Guy Gisbon is also a hottie, but he's a villian, a good villian, very villianous, he's so cute, then he kills someone randomly and how can you justify finding the villianous villian hot?
If I were 13, I'd have Robin Hood and his Merry Band of Boys plastered over my walls... yum.
Maid Marion can have Robin, but she's too grumpy. She's so wasting that ass. And apparently they have cute little shrugs back then too.
I'm sooo tired.
Night night folks.
Thursday, April 05, 2007
About Bridge
I will not play Bridge.
I am sure Bridge is fun. I am equally sure I would not be good at it. It requires 'paying attention' and I seldom, rarely, never, pay attention when I'm playing cards. I am sure that I could learn to play, that is not the issue.
I just don't want to learn how to play. Maybe one day, I will suddenly have the desire to play Bridge. Maybe I will fall into a social circle that is fanatical about Bridge. Probably not.
The thing is, I have a finite amount of time. I have three young children. I have school. I have writing. I barely have time to eek out time for myself, or my husband and I. And this is the main point.
When I can finally eek out time for myself, or my husband and I, I do not want to squander it playing a card game I don't care about. I prefer to squander it at a restaurant. At the movies. At a book club. At a friend's home. Shoot, I'd prefer to spend it playing Bunco, if there were wine and cheese. I mean, Bunco isn't a game so much as something to do with your hands while you talk. I don't want to waste it on something I would have to take seriously, or learn, or think about.
Thank you.
P.S. No Bridge fans were hurt, maimed, tormented or bitched at during the making of this post.
I am sure Bridge is fun. I am equally sure I would not be good at it. It requires 'paying attention' and I seldom, rarely, never, pay attention when I'm playing cards. I am sure that I could learn to play, that is not the issue.
I just don't want to learn how to play. Maybe one day, I will suddenly have the desire to play Bridge. Maybe I will fall into a social circle that is fanatical about Bridge. Probably not.
The thing is, I have a finite amount of time. I have three young children. I have school. I have writing. I barely have time to eek out time for myself, or my husband and I. And this is the main point.
When I can finally eek out time for myself, or my husband and I, I do not want to squander it playing a card game I don't care about. I prefer to squander it at a restaurant. At the movies. At a book club. At a friend's home. Shoot, I'd prefer to spend it playing Bunco, if there were wine and cheese. I mean, Bunco isn't a game so much as something to do with your hands while you talk. I don't want to waste it on something I would have to take seriously, or learn, or think about.
Thank you.
P.S. No Bridge fans were hurt, maimed, tormented or bitched at during the making of this post.
Saturday, March 31, 2007
Case of the Rainy Green Poop
Yes, what a lovely topic.
But it's not just about raining green poop, no, it is the events of a day that can only result in future therapy for Turbo Boy, and true severe reactions to furniture stores of all types.
Green pants, however, reign supreme.
It all started innocently enough.
We ventured out today to buy a kitchen table, since we're still using one of those gray plastic card tables. It all started out great, with a lunch at chilis. It went fairly well at Pier One where we found a counter height kitchen table (sale, thank you) that I like but Hubby McRed, who may also be known as "Tempermental Artist Hair" for reasons I may or may not blog about, is still unsure of the color, even though we now own it. We then went to Flat Irons, or Shopping Mecca Unlike Anything Seen in the East or West, where the trouble started.
Turbo and Bear were half asleep, but willing to venture into The Great Indoors, also known as "Large Massive Store of Overpriced, but Perty, Furniture, Furnishings and Flooring (I saw the soaking tub get-up that one day I Will Own And Put In My Mini-Castle In The Mountains... moving on...
...to escalaters, and, sheltered I am not, but yet I have not ever seen this contraption, an escalater for shopping carts. In the confusion as to what I was supposed to do to get the shopping car to go up, and my disbelief that it would work or was even a good idea, my son wandered ON TO THE ESCALATER. Okay, he's THREE. It's not the moving up that worries me. It's the getting off. He's three, he could tumble and fall all the way back down.
There are differing opinions on how I reacted, and I do not believe that I 'freaked out' as TAH would have you believe. Instead, I, in my wedge heels and still-healing ankle, merely yelled "Jesus Christ" and asked Drama to please run on to the escalaters to hold his hand. Drama ran and did this, but, inexplicably didn't hold his hand. He looked back. Apparently because after saying, not as loudly as one might insist, Jesus Christ, I called his name, he looked back, and fell.
Okay, fell is harsh. Also, I am not a big fan of the JC exclamation, but for some reason, seeing my little three year old all alone on that escalator, it's what came out. Perhaps I was hoping he would appear and do something, seeing as TAH just stood there, figuring if we left him alone he'd be fine.
Well. He fell, yes, but down one step. Then, since the escalater was constantly moving up, and he was trying to get up and crawl off, he really just ended up crawling in one spot yelling 'help momma help come get me.' To which I bravely hurled myself, wedge heel and weak ankle and all, on to the escalater, grasping poor Turbo into my arms, and carrying him up, all the while listening to him say 'get me momma. you came and get me.'
Now, this would have been fine, if we got off, and he carried on happily.
This did not happen.
"that was scary. that was scary. you got me. you got me momma? Hold my hand momma. I want a hand. Don't let go momma. that was scarry. We don't go down. we don't want to go down."
Uh oh.
So after a stroll around the upper level with the scared Drama, and the continuing commentary of his harrowing five seconds, it was time to go down. TAH held his hand and they talked about being brave and not being scared.
To which, upon getting off the escalater, went right out the window as Turbo grasped my hand and said 'it wasn't scary' with the most unconvincing look ever.
Then, to my horror, said "...but I fell and you got me, and you got me cuz I fell and you didn't get me, I'd be lost and go away and then I'd be all gone...."
Ummm.
OH NO....
uh oh.
"I'd be lost, and go away and then I'd be all gone."
Okay. WHY he would think that if I didn't get him he'd disappear and be gone, I'm not sure, but this thought was why I had to hold his hand in the truck until the other mall trip, ASSURING him with all my heart that I did get him and would never let him go (awwww) Now I wanted to burst out and go "OH MY BABY it's okay, I'll NEVER let you go, NOT EVER, OH BABY, MOMMA LOVES YOU, and I promise, I PROMISE, we will never go on another ESCALATOR again" but all that would do was reassure him that yes, he could have disappeared forever. So instead I said, "Oh honey, you fell, that was scary, huh? But you're okay now." In a confident, reassuring, Momma knows for real you would never have disappeared and never once DOUBTED that you would.
And you think this story should end now, right? Well, it does, for the escalator trauma sort of ended, after an hour of reassuring commentary, hold handing, and not letting go of Mommy...and the ensuing argument of the proper way the situation SHOULD have been handled between TAH and me.
But then, we went to the mall (elevators only). With two tired three year olds, one recently truamatized in a furniture store. So we got a double-decker fire truck stroller (way cool) and roamed the Mecca of All Malls East and West. Then, we smelled something. Something most foul. The Something Most Foul was temporarily drowned out by the excessive fruity mango scents of the Body Shop (they do home shows now, who knew?) but it became apparent Mom would have to change him.
And Mom did.
Utterly.
"It's rainy green poop, mom" said Turbo the Traumatized.
"Yes, it is," said Mom, wiping bright, flourescent green poop off said Turbo's butt. See, it was rainy, bright green, and liquidy. Someone has an icky sour tummy, I suspect Capt. Crunch Berries. I mean, why else would he be flourescent green? It leaked through his diaper onto his pants. I changed his diaper, and then, refusing to put icky wet, green-pooped-laden diapers on my son, stuck him, diaper and shoes (socks had to go too) in the stroller. I rolled the pants and socks up and stuck them in a plastic bag. Out we went to TAH, who's rolling his eyes at the time it took. Yes, I'd like to see what HE would have done.
He sees Turbo and shakes his head. This has happened before, about seven years ago, in a toy store in North Dakota, with Drama girl. We then went to the nearest children's store to buy Turbo pants. He ends up with overpriced shorts ($20 gimme a break) because someone (TAH) was too impatient to actually look at the price. Okay, in his defense, I don't think he actually knew that they made kid shorts that would cost $20. Turbo sees the pants and yells "I LOVE GREEN PANTS I LOVE GREEN PANTS' and gets all giddy putting them on.
So the story should end here, right?
HA HA HA HA
We are not brave fools, we are simply tenacious. We need furnishings. There is no other choice. We can not wait for the children to be in the right 'mood' for furniture shopping. There is no mood for that. So we move on.
We go to Westminster to check out this uber awesome furniture store that TAH neglected to tell me about. Now let it be said, that if Hubby McRed had told me of this store two weeks ago, we would have not had to spend two weekends scouring the local area's overpriced furniture stores for what we wanted, but 'nuff said.
It felt like HOURS, but finally, FINALLY we find what we are looking for. Well, what we want, but don't need for a few months. We NEEDED an arm chair, we ended up with a love seat and two chairs and ottomans. In our defense, all of it for the SAME PRICE (I love caps) as one arm chair from say, an overpriced furniture store. We also needed counter height chairs for our new dining room table, but neglected to find those, instead finding the perfect counter height table that TAH thought was perfect, but as I mentioned, since he never even bothered to mention this warehouse-sized furniture store to me, he can stuff it.
Something rotten then began to stink, almost as much as the behavior of the now over-tired and over-bored three year olds, who have begun tossing pillow cushions on the floor. Problem, I brought three diapers, I mean, these are three year olds being potty trained, who have one regular poop a day. I was not prepared for rainy green poop. All three diapers had been used. I did my best. I stuck Turbo in the stall, wiped up his little bright green ass, and, lacking a diaper, wiped up the icky green diaper as much as I could. Now, refusing to stick an icky wet green diaper back on my son's butt, I placed three layers of paper towels over the icky diaper, THEN put it back on (Like I said, I had no diapers, having used all three, and it was clear to me NOT having a diaper could result in a far worse situation) and said okay baby, we're all done shopping now. And we were.
Now, the grumpy icky tummy boy is in bed, hopefully the worst of the rainy green poop is gone. I fear however, that Bear is just starting his. Hubby McRed, no longer being called TAH, is now not feeling good, though this probably has to do with the Indian he ate tonight, been awhile since he's had the Indian food.
I am finally chilling.
But it's not just about raining green poop, no, it is the events of a day that can only result in future therapy for Turbo Boy, and true severe reactions to furniture stores of all types.
Green pants, however, reign supreme.
It all started innocently enough.
We ventured out today to buy a kitchen table, since we're still using one of those gray plastic card tables. It all started out great, with a lunch at chilis. It went fairly well at Pier One where we found a counter height kitchen table (sale, thank you) that I like but Hubby McRed, who may also be known as "Tempermental Artist Hair" for reasons I may or may not blog about, is still unsure of the color, even though we now own it. We then went to Flat Irons, or Shopping Mecca Unlike Anything Seen in the East or West, where the trouble started.
Turbo and Bear were half asleep, but willing to venture into The Great Indoors, also known as "Large Massive Store of Overpriced, but Perty, Furniture, Furnishings and Flooring (I saw the soaking tub get-up that one day I Will Own And Put In My Mini-Castle In The Mountains... moving on...
...to escalaters, and, sheltered I am not, but yet I have not ever seen this contraption, an escalater for shopping carts. In the confusion as to what I was supposed to do to get the shopping car to go up, and my disbelief that it would work or was even a good idea, my son wandered ON TO THE ESCALATER. Okay, he's THREE. It's not the moving up that worries me. It's the getting off. He's three, he could tumble and fall all the way back down.
There are differing opinions on how I reacted, and I do not believe that I 'freaked out' as TAH would have you believe. Instead, I, in my wedge heels and still-healing ankle, merely yelled "Jesus Christ" and asked Drama to please run on to the escalaters to hold his hand. Drama ran and did this, but, inexplicably didn't hold his hand. He looked back. Apparently because after saying, not as loudly as one might insist, Jesus Christ, I called his name, he looked back, and fell.
Okay, fell is harsh. Also, I am not a big fan of the JC exclamation, but for some reason, seeing my little three year old all alone on that escalator, it's what came out. Perhaps I was hoping he would appear and do something, seeing as TAH just stood there, figuring if we left him alone he'd be fine.
Well. He fell, yes, but down one step. Then, since the escalater was constantly moving up, and he was trying to get up and crawl off, he really just ended up crawling in one spot yelling 'help momma help come get me.' To which I bravely hurled myself, wedge heel and weak ankle and all, on to the escalater, grasping poor Turbo into my arms, and carrying him up, all the while listening to him say 'get me momma. you came and get me.'
Now, this would have been fine, if we got off, and he carried on happily.
This did not happen.
"that was scary. that was scary. you got me. you got me momma? Hold my hand momma. I want a hand. Don't let go momma. that was scarry. We don't go down. we don't want to go down."
Uh oh.
So after a stroll around the upper level with the scared Drama, and the continuing commentary of his harrowing five seconds, it was time to go down. TAH held his hand and they talked about being brave and not being scared.
To which, upon getting off the escalater, went right out the window as Turbo grasped my hand and said 'it wasn't scary' with the most unconvincing look ever.
Then, to my horror, said "...but I fell and you got me, and you got me cuz I fell and you didn't get me, I'd be lost and go away and then I'd be all gone...."
Ummm.
OH NO....
uh oh.
"I'd be lost, and go away and then I'd be all gone."
Okay. WHY he would think that if I didn't get him he'd disappear and be gone, I'm not sure, but this thought was why I had to hold his hand in the truck until the other mall trip, ASSURING him with all my heart that I did get him and would never let him go (awwww) Now I wanted to burst out and go "OH MY BABY it's okay, I'll NEVER let you go, NOT EVER, OH BABY, MOMMA LOVES YOU, and I promise, I PROMISE, we will never go on another ESCALATOR again" but all that would do was reassure him that yes, he could have disappeared forever. So instead I said, "Oh honey, you fell, that was scary, huh? But you're okay now." In a confident, reassuring, Momma knows for real you would never have disappeared and never once DOUBTED that you would.
And you think this story should end now, right? Well, it does, for the escalator trauma sort of ended, after an hour of reassuring commentary, hold handing, and not letting go of Mommy...and the ensuing argument of the proper way the situation SHOULD have been handled between TAH and me.
But then, we went to the mall (elevators only). With two tired three year olds, one recently truamatized in a furniture store. So we got a double-decker fire truck stroller (way cool) and roamed the Mecca of All Malls East and West. Then, we smelled something. Something most foul. The Something Most Foul was temporarily drowned out by the excessive fruity mango scents of the Body Shop (they do home shows now, who knew?) but it became apparent Mom would have to change him.
And Mom did.
Utterly.
"It's rainy green poop, mom" said Turbo the Traumatized.
"Yes, it is," said Mom, wiping bright, flourescent green poop off said Turbo's butt. See, it was rainy, bright green, and liquidy. Someone has an icky sour tummy, I suspect Capt. Crunch Berries. I mean, why else would he be flourescent green? It leaked through his diaper onto his pants. I changed his diaper, and then, refusing to put icky wet, green-pooped-laden diapers on my son, stuck him, diaper and shoes (socks had to go too) in the stroller. I rolled the pants and socks up and stuck them in a plastic bag. Out we went to TAH, who's rolling his eyes at the time it took. Yes, I'd like to see what HE would have done.
He sees Turbo and shakes his head. This has happened before, about seven years ago, in a toy store in North Dakota, with Drama girl. We then went to the nearest children's store to buy Turbo pants. He ends up with overpriced shorts ($20 gimme a break) because someone (TAH) was too impatient to actually look at the price. Okay, in his defense, I don't think he actually knew that they made kid shorts that would cost $20. Turbo sees the pants and yells "I LOVE GREEN PANTS I LOVE GREEN PANTS' and gets all giddy putting them on.
So the story should end here, right?
HA HA HA HA
We are not brave fools, we are simply tenacious. We need furnishings. There is no other choice. We can not wait for the children to be in the right 'mood' for furniture shopping. There is no mood for that. So we move on.
We go to Westminster to check out this uber awesome furniture store that TAH neglected to tell me about. Now let it be said, that if Hubby McRed had told me of this store two weeks ago, we would have not had to spend two weekends scouring the local area's overpriced furniture stores for what we wanted, but 'nuff said.
It felt like HOURS, but finally, FINALLY we find what we are looking for. Well, what we want, but don't need for a few months. We NEEDED an arm chair, we ended up with a love seat and two chairs and ottomans. In our defense, all of it for the SAME PRICE (I love caps) as one arm chair from say, an overpriced furniture store. We also needed counter height chairs for our new dining room table, but neglected to find those, instead finding the perfect counter height table that TAH thought was perfect, but as I mentioned, since he never even bothered to mention this warehouse-sized furniture store to me, he can stuff it.
Something rotten then began to stink, almost as much as the behavior of the now over-tired and over-bored three year olds, who have begun tossing pillow cushions on the floor. Problem, I brought three diapers, I mean, these are three year olds being potty trained, who have one regular poop a day. I was not prepared for rainy green poop. All three diapers had been used. I did my best. I stuck Turbo in the stall, wiped up his little bright green ass, and, lacking a diaper, wiped up the icky green diaper as much as I could. Now, refusing to stick an icky wet green diaper back on my son's butt, I placed three layers of paper towels over the icky diaper, THEN put it back on (Like I said, I had no diapers, having used all three, and it was clear to me NOT having a diaper could result in a far worse situation) and said okay baby, we're all done shopping now. And we were.
Now, the grumpy icky tummy boy is in bed, hopefully the worst of the rainy green poop is gone. I fear however, that Bear is just starting his. Hubby McRed, no longer being called TAH, is now not feeling good, though this probably has to do with the Indian he ate tonight, been awhile since he's had the Indian food.
I am finally chilling.
Sunday, March 25, 2007
blind dilemma
Okay,
So ignore the midnight anxiety attack about blinds. It's a stress thing.
I'm just going to call tomorrow afternoon and enquire as to the time frame. I know it takes a while to get blinds, so I put up those temporary pleated blinds, and we got curtains for our bedroom, so I'm happy. I'll be getting my daughter her curtains later this week (easy easy since she's doing fairies and a blue room) and the boys will have to be ordered online. (Why can't builders install regular-sized windows, not windows that are 3/4 of a size different?)
Let me just say, I took a bath in my deep soaking tub, and it was bliss. I'm now content.
Still unpacking (ugh) and trying to get rid of the boxes and paper (may resort to slipping items into the builder's dumpster next door ha ha ha) but I'm mostly done.
I found the perfect place to get our kitchen table and 'club chair' because we are doing Scandinavian style inspired room furnishings. By room furnishings, I mean the kitchen table and club chair, we're not refurnishing the whole house, tempting as some of those couches were. You don't come out of a financial recovery with a furniture shopping spree!
The boys got new toddler sleigh beds, courtesy Walmart, $50 a pop. Drama is getting a loft bed next month after cutting her a deal that basically resulted in her getting to get a loft bed if she'd wait a month.
So far, all is well, and we are settling. I will feel settled as soon as paint is on the walls. I despise builder white. I'm allergic to it!
how's everyone else?
So ignore the midnight anxiety attack about blinds. It's a stress thing.
I'm just going to call tomorrow afternoon and enquire as to the time frame. I know it takes a while to get blinds, so I put up those temporary pleated blinds, and we got curtains for our bedroom, so I'm happy. I'll be getting my daughter her curtains later this week (easy easy since she's doing fairies and a blue room) and the boys will have to be ordered online. (Why can't builders install regular-sized windows, not windows that are 3/4 of a size different?)
Let me just say, I took a bath in my deep soaking tub, and it was bliss. I'm now content.
Still unpacking (ugh) and trying to get rid of the boxes and paper (may resort to slipping items into the builder's dumpster next door ha ha ha) but I'm mostly done.
I found the perfect place to get our kitchen table and 'club chair' because we are doing Scandinavian style inspired room furnishings. By room furnishings, I mean the kitchen table and club chair, we're not refurnishing the whole house, tempting as some of those couches were. You don't come out of a financial recovery with a furniture shopping spree!
The boys got new toddler sleigh beds, courtesy Walmart, $50 a pop. Drama is getting a loft bed next month after cutting her a deal that basically resulted in her getting to get a loft bed if she'd wait a month.
So far, all is well, and we are settling. I will feel settled as soon as paint is on the walls. I despise builder white. I'm allergic to it!
how's everyone else?
Friday, March 23, 2007
Blinds blinds blinds
Why is it so hard to get blinds?
I'm still waiting for the home depot to call and set up a time for the measurements.
Actually, at this point, I pretty much decided tomorrow I'm probably going to go back and cancel the order, and use budget blinds. See, I have to wait for the home depot to take measurements before the blinds can even be ordered. Which takes two weeks. It's already been three days and I haven't even received a phone call to schedule a time just to take measurements. Which means that the person won't even be out til sometime late next week. Then, the blinds ordered after that.... The most annoying thing is how annoyed I am with it. I can't even sleep because I'm annoyed they never even bothered to call to set up an appointment. I'm also bothered that it's just going to take so long. I was willing to wait say, two weeks from today. But not two weeks from next Wednesday.... argh.
I"m kind of annoyed because I liked the blinds I picked out, but I don't want to wait three more weeks with wide open windows on the lower level (we're doing our own window treatments upstairs) so... I think I have to ix nay home depot. Should I wait or not wait? I'm definitely going to call home depot, but sheesh, why is it so hard to be professionally timely?
Anyone work with budget blinds?
Thursday, March 22, 2007
In Home, Have Web.
Weeee.
I am living in my own home again.
With internet.
And cable.
But no window treatments... EXHIBITIONIST!
The Home Depot man is supposed to call to set up an appt. for measurements. If he doesn't call today I'm calling the home depot. He has time, it takes two weeks to get the ones I want in (Bali, faux wood, yeah I said faux, what's it to you? Coconut Sandblast, which has a 'faux sanded wood' texture... Bali had an awesome sale -- I PERSONALLY was going to go with 'el home depot cheapo faux wood, but Hubby McRed pointed out we'd only be doing this once, so why not do it right, but faux right, no need to get carried away...
That only leaves the upstairs... Curtains for Drama Girl (and let me tell you, there was much drama when Drama was yakking up her guts the other night... why can't she at least TRY yakking with just a bit of courtesy.... maybe without the aaahhh no no aaaah's or the loud squeals from the acid burns.... I mean it was 2 a.m. for crying out loud, you think she was yakking up alien octupi that spawned in her gut...)
I am thinking shades in the boys room, because they have four windows, and curtains would be just waaay too much.
Well,
YES I'm back weeeeee
I am living in my own home again.
With internet.
And cable.
But no window treatments... EXHIBITIONIST!
The Home Depot man is supposed to call to set up an appt. for measurements. If he doesn't call today I'm calling the home depot. He has time, it takes two weeks to get the ones I want in (Bali, faux wood, yeah I said faux, what's it to you? Coconut Sandblast, which has a 'faux sanded wood' texture... Bali had an awesome sale -- I PERSONALLY was going to go with 'el home depot cheapo faux wood, but Hubby McRed pointed out we'd only be doing this once, so why not do it right, but faux right, no need to get carried away...
That only leaves the upstairs... Curtains for Drama Girl (and let me tell you, there was much drama when Drama was yakking up her guts the other night... why can't she at least TRY yakking with just a bit of courtesy.... maybe without the aaahhh no no aaaah's or the loud squeals from the acid burns.... I mean it was 2 a.m. for crying out loud, you think she was yakking up alien octupi that spawned in her gut...)
I am thinking shades in the boys room, because they have four windows, and curtains would be just waaay too much.
Well,
YES I'm back weeeeee
Monday, March 12, 2007
Colorado Lottery
No, I did not win the 142 million dollar lottery.
I'm sure it was just a mistake, and we will win the 162 million dollar lottery....
I'm sure it was just a mistake, and we will win the 162 million dollar lottery....
Saturday, March 10, 2007
Got Da Money
Okay,
We finally got our money. Turns out they didn't bother funding the other day. Sheesh.
But all is well now.
Except I have to visit the Dread Laws, and that is another blog all unto itself.
I may start a Dread Law blog, depending on how things go.
If you think I exaggerate, and it's just a case of in-law fussiness, you haven't met them or heard the stories. I won't even START the stories now, because it's an entire blog unto itself. Trust me when I say, Dread Law is correct. Darth Law works as well, too. I'm assured things are going to be different, and they aren't going to 'start' but as far as I know, Hell is still pretty freakin' hot...
On the CUTE side of things, Little Miss Drama gave Grandma a BIIIIIIG hug and said she LOVED her, truly sincerely. I mean it was a bear hug. It was cute. Grandpa Bob (her husband, who is just grandpa because what are we going to call him? step grandpa? His name would be inappropriate... anyhow who cares they've been married 15 years) thought it was just so adorable. Turbo and Bear finally warmed up to them all and Turbo fell asleep on Grandma's lap. Cute, considering he spends most of his time telling her 'no, just mommy.'
They've made us feel really welcome here, and this may be a flaw. You see, they did the basement for us, for our visit at Christmas, which was never to be. So then they gave it to my husband for two months while he was working in Colorado and I was back in Wash. Now we are all here, in their souped up basement. I mean, it's got the good carpeting, tile bathroom with hot hot shower, a big comfy bed, cable television, desk with internet, it's decorated to the hilt, I mean, you know, if you only want guests to stay a few days, this isn't the setup that says 'leave in three days'.... ha ha ha.
We're only here til Thursday. It's a longer than normal visit. I've been TRYING to not make a huge footprint but I have three kids, it's hard. So I do dishes and clean up counters and messes and pick up toys and shoes ugh. I don't mind doing it becasue it's not my house but wow it is nice to just leave stuff around every now and again ;) (but really rude when you're at grandma's and it's all soooo nice and pretty... apparently Hubby McRed got his decorating genes from his mom)
So so far all is well on this end.
Ta!
Friday, March 09, 2007
Nooo money yet
Bastages.
GIVE ME MY MONEY..,.
So when they said they were funding yesterday, they apparently didn't.
So when they then said that it would post after midnight, it didn't.
PEOPLE...
There are folks living in my old home, and I have no money.
GIVE ME MY MONEY....
aaahhhhh
GIVE ME MY MONEY..,.
So when they said they were funding yesterday, they apparently didn't.
So when they then said that it would post after midnight, it didn't.
PEOPLE...
There are folks living in my old home, and I have no money.
GIVE ME MY MONEY....
aaahhhhh
Wednesday, March 07, 2007
My Realtor
On why I don't have my money from the house yet...
So I thought the borrowers were just being spastic pinheads that coudldn't get their shit together and kept forgetting documents.
nope.
So apparently, the stock market went bimpity boom.
Lenders have to be able to sell their loans on the secondary market.
Stock market going bimpity boom means that things need to be adjusted, tightened or loosened, based on the market.
So when it went bimpity boom, some requirements on the loans changed, and those changes needed to be incorporated into the documents and resigned. So this took time. Like, four days so far. Okay, three days. But still.
The good news is....
The buyers signed all their paperwork at 3 p.m. today. Which means all the paperwork went to the lender tonight, to be HOPEFULLY recorded and funded tomorrow. I can not imagine WHY it would not be recorded and funded tomorrow, but I'm sure if the lender can find a way to not fund it until Friday, then the lender will use it and not fund til Friday JUST to torment me. However, I'm pretty confident I'm going to get my money since I don't believe anyone would allow the buyers to actually sign closing papers and go to their new home with their new key if they didn't have the loan funding set up. My realtor didn't want to say they would fund tomorrow. This is because she said they'd fund today. I think orginally they wanted a 24 hour doc review, but had agreed not to for this loan. I don't know. I just want my damned money.
So, any lender legalese guys/gals out there who can tell me what the frack is going on or was going on? My realtor insinuated that we weren't the only ones suffering this, and that it was all new ground since it's been so long since the market went bimpity boom.
Anyone? bankers? lenders?
Pretty please?
So I thought the borrowers were just being spastic pinheads that coudldn't get their shit together and kept forgetting documents.
nope.
So apparently, the stock market went bimpity boom.
Lenders have to be able to sell their loans on the secondary market.
Stock market going bimpity boom means that things need to be adjusted, tightened or loosened, based on the market.
So when it went bimpity boom, some requirements on the loans changed, and those changes needed to be incorporated into the documents and resigned. So this took time. Like, four days so far. Okay, three days. But still.
The good news is....
The buyers signed all their paperwork at 3 p.m. today. Which means all the paperwork went to the lender tonight, to be HOPEFULLY recorded and funded tomorrow. I can not imagine WHY it would not be recorded and funded tomorrow, but I'm sure if the lender can find a way to not fund it until Friday, then the lender will use it and not fund til Friday JUST to torment me. However, I'm pretty confident I'm going to get my money since I don't believe anyone would allow the buyers to actually sign closing papers and go to their new home with their new key if they didn't have the loan funding set up. My realtor didn't want to say they would fund tomorrow. This is because she said they'd fund today. I think orginally they wanted a 24 hour doc review, but had agreed not to for this loan. I don't know. I just want my damned money.
So, any lender legalese guys/gals out there who can tell me what the frack is going on or was going on? My realtor insinuated that we weren't the only ones suffering this, and that it was all new ground since it's been so long since the market went bimpity boom.
Anyone? bankers? lenders?
Pretty please?
Tuesday, March 06, 2007
Colorado
We're here.
We got here after a straight 20-hour drive (literally, and no, you should never do it yourself) sometime Sunday afternoon. Monday I had to meet the movers at the storage unit. Today I had to run around and find a way to open a bank account that would actually let me get my money out, and now, I'm here to say HI I"M HERE, and catch up on homework, and hopefully, sometime this week, sleep.
:)
I will be visiting all my fave blogs this week! I've MISSED them lol. Hope everyone is having fun!
We got here after a straight 20-hour drive (literally, and no, you should never do it yourself) sometime Sunday afternoon. Monday I had to meet the movers at the storage unit. Today I had to run around and find a way to open a bank account that would actually let me get my money out, and now, I'm here to say HI I"M HERE, and catch up on homework, and hopefully, sometime this week, sleep.
:)
I will be visiting all my fave blogs this week! I've MISSED them lol. Hope everyone is having fun!
Friday, March 02, 2007
Irony
Hubby McRed always thinks we are too slow. We are never ready on time, we are never truly prepared, we are never accomodating. (We, being his wife and three children) We slow progress down. We go out of our way to manipulate the universe into going slower. If we were in charge of evolution, we'd barely be out of the marshes.
So, we were going to move today, but now, must wait until tomorrow to make the drive.
Why? What happened? What is the hold up?
......
Hubby McRed's 16-year old Nissan, 300z twin turbo, can't make the drive to Colorado and has to be specially treated to a $1500 (YES I KNOW) carrier service, of which, when given a four day window to pick up the car, called yesterday to say it'd be picked up today, then called this morning to say 'at 7 p.m.' then called again at 7 p.m. to say 'midnight.'
So.
Why are we still here?
Not because of Mom, or the kids, or the cats, (of which only one belongs to me actually) but because of his car.
I refuse to let him even think grumpy thoughts about me, because we were ready to go at 6!
So that is irony. However, Hubby McRed is in too foul a mood for me to express that ironic sentiment. I'll give him a month or three before pointing it out....
So, we were going to move today, but now, must wait until tomorrow to make the drive.
Why? What happened? What is the hold up?
......
Hubby McRed's 16-year old Nissan, 300z twin turbo, can't make the drive to Colorado and has to be specially treated to a $1500 (YES I KNOW) carrier service, of which, when given a four day window to pick up the car, called yesterday to say it'd be picked up today, then called this morning to say 'at 7 p.m.' then called again at 7 p.m. to say 'midnight.'
So.
Why are we still here?
Not because of Mom, or the kids, or the cats, (of which only one belongs to me actually) but because of his car.
I refuse to let him even think grumpy thoughts about me, because we were ready to go at 6!
So that is irony. However, Hubby McRed is in too foul a mood for me to express that ironic sentiment. I'll give him a month or three before pointing it out....
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