Wednesday, November 28, 2007

37 feels like 29

I understand that the 'feels like' degree underneath the actual degree is wind chill, but it seems silly. It's 37 degrees, but it feels like 29 degrees... I'm in a very good mood, but it feels like a crappy mood.... I ran three miles but it felt like five....

Anyhow, I've applied to a few jobs but it feels like I've applied to a hundred... ha ha ha.

I know that is January's resolution, but I'm getting an early start. I think I mentioned that I generally get, for three months worth of looking, one or two interviews or phone interviews. I'm not going to go into long laundry lists of who I applied to or where, or my networking attempts, or anything like that, but every now and again I'm sure I'll feel compelled to blog about this hunt.

See, it gets under my skin. I start dreaming about it. I dreamt, for instance, that I was hired as a crisis communications coordinator, and that I had to fly to Kansas to help a small start-up hard-drive manufacturer handle their crisis communication plans, mainly contingency plans for what to do in case of tornados, (run to the basement and hide under a mattress?) and how to get their men in the separate shop out of dodge, (secret underground tunnel to basement stocked with mattresses?) as well as corporate scandals that may arise. Now I didn't say the dreams were accurate, but the amount of detail is a bit spooky and they are very weird.

Start up hard drive manufacturer in KANSAS?
With top secret shops (to hide their uber secret that will make them an uber corporation)
The fact the guy had three kids (weird, I know)
And, we all drank amber beer.

Dreams never have to make sense, but it felt a little eerily weird. I woke up feeling like I actually worked!

Sunday, November 25, 2007

Nanner nanner, coulda shoulda but didn't



They coulda won. But they didn't.

It was a good game and don't tell me my team is the evil empire. They play really well.

But, for you, my 'stuck in Korea' friend...


nanner nanner nanner my team kicked your team's ass nanner nanner nanner....

Wednesday, November 21, 2007

Let it snow let it snow

So, we have snow. Even now, we have little bits of white floating down heavily. I think it's a wet snow, but I haven't been outside to verify.

Drama Girl is being incredibly obnoxious about it. It's not even two inches, and worse, not even 8 a.m. Ah, yes, the children woke up at 6 a.m. today.

Turbo is not feeling well, and sleeping on the couch, with his 'throw up' bucket. I gave it to him after the previous night's (night before last) event. It came to my attention that my almost-four (two weeks) son was so eager to throw up and get every icky thing out of his stomach that he paid no attention to how perilously close to falling into the actual toilet head-first she was. Flooded by horrendous thoughts of my little baby getting up at 3 a.m., yakking into the toilet, falling in and well.... yes, I'm a mother, these thoughts occur to me... I told him we don't throw up in the toilet without mommy, and handed him a throw up bucket. It's just his head was so close...

Bear is being silly and happy, and Drama Girl is irritating him, so we may banish Drama Girl, on account of her being too freakin obnoxious this early in the morning.

So the snow is well, white. And it's, well, cold. And I have to go out today and pick up a pie. Weeeh.

At least it had the courtesy to snow politely the day BEFORE the holiday, though it probably sucks for travelers.

Monday, November 19, 2007

the resolution

Okay, so my sons, three days later are still fighting. I gave up untangling them.

My new resolution, made in November, well, there's two.

The first is to finish the first draft of my book idea. I should be able to start this once the holidays are over and, more importantly, school is.

The second one is to find a job. Not just any job. A job I actually like, in my field, no less.

Those who have read this have heard about me and my job and so on and so forth endlessly. I'm not going to whine, or fuss, or mope or moan. I'm just going to keep an update, and just write about it, and we'll see, for ourselves, how long it takes, you know, all in good fun...

This of course is not like other job searches where people have had jobs. I've been out of work for four years, ostensibly to get my masters :).

So we shall see.

But that is my New Year's resolution, which I'm starting.... now.

To kick it off, I've applied to three jobs. Go me. Keep in mind, I"m not going to bother about jobs I've applied to, I"m only keeping track of things that actually 'happen.' I figure, so far, I average interest once every three months...


As for the book? Well, I have a break in classes over Christmas, and the characters and plot will be hashed out. They are in my head, have been since i moved here, and are the major reason I ditched the freakin 17 chapters already written for another book, so go me.

Friday, November 16, 2007

Friday, November 09, 2007

The Changed Me

Doesn't that sound like I'm suddenly changed and enlightened?

I'm not.

But I did a bit of reflection and realized, without realizing it, how much I've changed, for the better, but they are all, except for the first on the list, internal changes that haven't yet manifested externally.

In other words, I've changed a lot on the inside, and now some of those changes are beginning to affect me 'outside'.

Since moving to Colorado, I've lost about 20 pounds (and we shall not discuss how I managed to put on those 20 pounds without really even noticing it...) going down two and a half sizes in the process... so close to three... That is the biggest internal change that is clear and obvious.

Here are some that are only evident to me, and that's only because it came to me in a moment of sudden insight.

I used to whine I had no friends in close proximity. I still don't, but I realized, I don't need friends in close proximity so much as I need to like me. It wasn't that I didn't like me, it was that I was very unsatisfied with what was me.

I used to obsess about writing... now, I write for the sake of my stories and the love of my tales. I guarantee I will now finish stories. I lost the most important ingredient to successful writing... letting the story be what it is. I would force it to a convention that I didn't like. Writing the story I want to tell, well, much more fun. And in doing that, I realized, the writing that is true to me, not the genre I have been trying to write in. Feel like slapping myself for that I do.

I wanted to do everything right. I wanted the house to be clean, the grades to be A's, the stories published, the dinner a culinary delight and enough time for it all. HA. Now, I realize the grades can be A's, the stories one day potentially published, and well, frankly, we don't have a lot of company and pizza works for us all.

I used to obsess that my kids just weren't like other kids. They aren't. So what? So I will never be a soccer mom because my kids don't do soccer. Nor will I be posting Drama Girl's grades. So my daughter has ADHD and acts a bit immature and needs more hands on parenting. Whatev. Right? She's mine. We'll do our own thing. The boys? Who knows who they'll be. But they're mine.

So, overall, I'm calmer about things. I have an inner confidence I seemed to have misplaced. Exercising has made my brain less cluttered somehow. Oh that didn't happen at first, but it's been about six or seven months of exercising a good hour a day for three days a week, and something has changed. My mind seems, lighter... full of oxygen.... not toxic....

I've almost finished my degree.

And, to be honest, I'm getting bored at home.


Thursday, November 01, 2007

Gods of the NFL


Sunday. I am so there. I"m doing some classwork early so I won't be distracted by 'not doing classwork mindfully' guilt.

Colts vs Pats

I can't wait.

But let me just say here, with all this whining about how the Patriots are not being 'honorable' and going for those extra points instead of 'being nice' and not rubbing it in too badly... well...


If every one of those teams hadn't jumped on the Pats and name-called and whined and cried about how they were cheaters, than perhaps the Pats wouldn't have to put up these points to show the NFL that while what they did was wrong, it was only a more advanced form of getting the same information all other teams try to get.... (logic may be a bit flawed, but I don't think what they did 'changed' games)

No one can say the Pats aren't the best team in the NFL right now. They dominate. They just do. I think the Colts are the only team that can stop them right now.

Which is why I'm so stoked about Sunday's game.

Go Pats.... yeah.... and I hope it's a good game, but don't whine to me about how many points they put up. You don't like it, well, play some frakkin' football then!


What happened to October?
Had birthday, underwhelmed. We didn't do much, October was just a crazy month.

Trick or treating was nice, since Drama Girl elected to go with a friend to her church event. I took the boys out, but this neighborhood is not the most festive. I'm hoping they have a little more enthusiasm over Christmas.

I have just officially gone under 30 percent body fat... thank you all very much... it helps to sign up your kids for programs at the place you work out. You're kind of trapped into doing something exercisey...

I know I used to be a daily blogger, and now I'm turning into a weekly one, well would you believe, I'm busy now? Not just busy, but overwhelmed busy! So busy, that I'm reading "I Don't Know How She Does IT?" the Only Thing is, it's about a mom who works and is jugging everything and handles it. I relate to her, only, the part where we aren't alike is where I don't have a job.... and I STILL am barely doing it! Yes, October was overwhelming. November looks to be overwhelming as well. School... ah... school.... is killing... me....slowly....

I'm striving to not procrastinate on these next assignments... seriously... send... help...

So here's the quick update:
Turbo potty trained
Bear still adamantly refusing to use pot
Drama Girl very moody... it's a tween thing... has glasses, very cute on her, but overpriced... went to wrong place so paid out of pocket, and can't seem to remember to submit 'out of network' forms... someone please remind me
Hubby McRed cranky about work, that is norm.

Hoping to not forget to register my truck this month....