Friday, August 31, 2007

Friday Night... boooring

I have pretty much come to terms with my lack of a social life.

I'm pretty sure it won't improve until I have a job and meet people.

Contrary to popular belief, having kids doesn't help you meet people, not even all the other people who had kids and wanted to meet people. Mom to Mom competition in the preschool years is pretty intense, so it's usually just stressful.

Learning from how frustrating it was to join a mom's club, I won't join one here.
I suppose really I'm doomed socially until my boys enter school, and I can start volunteering. See, I have Drama Girl in school, but I can't really volunteer because I have no one around to watch the boys while I do.

Or until I get a job.

Whichever comes first.

But tonight, alas, my husband is staying late at work, because, yes, Fantasy Football time.
Drama Girl is at her first sleepover at a friend's. Drama Girl isn't involved in a lot of activities, so friendship making time is limited. She has to complete two months of swim lessons successfully before I let her do gymnastics.

Why? Because Drama Girl is almost 11 and can't swim. Won't let me teach her. Or daddy. Nope. So back to lessons.

So tonight, I am stuck with Turbo and Bear, both who told me to 'go away.' Shoot, even they don't want to play with me.

SOMEONE come and play with me.

.....

um after Dr. Who....

Friday, August 24, 2007

Talking is cheap, but time consuming

When Drama Girl was six, we were visiting my parents in Tennessee, and had stopped at a diner that paid homage to Elvis.

"Who's that," she asked, pointing to one of several pictures of Elvis, this particular one being in our bathroom stall.

"That," I said, "Is the King of Rock and Roll, Elvis Presley."

I may have been a bit dramatic, but we were in Tennessee after all. And who doesn't love Elvis?

"He's cute."

She was entranced. Riveted by his looks, as so many women were. His eyes twinkled from the picture. So, I ruined the moment. I'm a mom. It's what I do.

"He's dead now," I said. "He died a long time ago."

Drama Girl looked visibly sad. She'd never heard his music, but seemed to sense from one picture in a bathroom stall the magic that he was in life, those years ago.

"How'd he die?"

Well, this was the tricky thing, really. She's six. I could lie. I could tell her he had an accident. I mean, she was ONLY six. But one of my fears in life is that I would be one of those moms that never talked to their kid about anything, or worse, one of those moms who sit their kid down at 13 and tell them EVERYTHING. Too much too fast is as useless as not at all.

"Well, he died from DRUGS. He had a problem, he took drugs he didn't need and one day, he took too many by accident, and he died." I looked at the picture in our stall. "In his bathroom."

Drama Girl looked at me with wide eyes.
"In his bathroom?"

"Yes, he passed out, because the drugs had made him sick."

"Drugs killed him?"

"Yes."

"Drugs are bad for you?"

"VERY bad for you, except the ones your doctor tells you to take, for medicine, but you only take medicine the right way. But yes, drugs are bad for you."

"Yeah, because they KILLED Elvis."

"Yes, they did."

And thus began the dialogue between Drama Girl and I about drugs. It was light, really, drugs was a word that represented something 'bad' and 'dangerous' at first, and as she became older, the talks became a bit more specific. You can smoke it. Your friends might try it. It's bad for you like smoking. It looks harmless, sometimes like an asprin, but it's really not. Never take medicine from your friends, you know the talk. It's the talks the parent moms and dads on television have with their kids. Always in casual moments, never out of the blue, just consistent reinforcement of the same message.

I believe in these talks. I believe they are her best defense against drugs and peer pressure. We'll have more talks, too, and I hate them, I really hate having them. I hate telling her about the darker side of life. But I have to. We've talked about stranger danger. I've even gone through scenarios with her, based on her 'what if...' questions. And I challenge her with my own... 'what if someone asks you for directions, to help find a puppy, the way to the school, knows your name...' It's not fun, I hate that the world isn't safe enough for her to go out without having to be somewhat savvy, but it's not, and she must be prepared as much as she can.

Our latest talks were on the changes she was going through. Drama Girl is going to be eleven soon, and we had to buy her, well, bras. At first she was excited, but then the constant necessity of wearing either a bra or a thick camisole, depending on the shirt, has begun to annoy her. I have to remind her every other day. We talked about 'periods' because I know soon she'll either learn it in school or well, have it. I had the mental image of my daughter beginning for the first time, not knowing what it was because I never told her, screaming in the bathroom. She'd then hold a grudge against me for months, after the horror and tears faded. She's not called Drama Girl for nothing. I remember my first time. I thought I had a cut. Yeah, I wasn't really bright back then.

All of the time I talk to my daughter, she's responding, talking, asking questions, and I hide my twitchiness, my innate desire to have her magically become a woman without having to tell her the hard things, by cooking, cleaning, playing with my hair, playing with her hair, anything, and all the while, I'm watching her, listening to her, because I don't want to tell her too much, too fast. From her reaction I can tell she isn't ready to talk about sex, which is fine with me, but I did tell her the biology of it. Frankly, I'm surprised one of her friends already hasn't. But then I dropped it. She thinks kissing is gross. I'm good with that. However, she kept going back to drugs and bras. Those were the things I focused on. How to say no. Why she should say no. How hard it can be. The tough choices she would have to make.

Man, I hope she listens.

I wondered then, what do other moms do? How and when do they talk to their kids? I know I'm not the only one. I know I come from a generation of women who either were told nothing or too much, a generation of women who now want to get it right. We don't want our daughters to stumble into the unknown unprepared. We've been to the unknown. We have the ability to map it out for them, give them a compass and a guide. Avoid this, stay close to this, don't stray here, if you get lost, head this way... How do others help their kids navigate these years?

And, will they listen?

Some of Us Will Die without the Internet

Sadly, I might be one of them.

My cable went out for like, a day, (YES< a whole day) and I was very very very mildly grumpy about it. Turns out we needed a new modem, but that's not the point. The point is, I felt very very very mildly grumpy, not to mention I do bills, shop, socialize (I'm a sahm, give me a break) and schoolwork all online. It was a rough day.

Saying that, Drama Girl is back in school, and on this, the first cool day in a while, it dawned on me, she doesn't have a fall coat, and my boys don't have fall shirts/coats either.

Oopsie.

See that was the thing about Washington State, it was mostly the same weather all year round, with a short hot break that I complained about.

So next week I'll make a Target run for the boys fall wear and Drama Girl's coat.

My school starts up next week, and really, four classes left to go, I just want to be done. But, I have to get through those four classes, you see, and now that I'm settled, hopefully I can do better. I really want As this semester. Not that I'm driven or anything.

Other news in brief...
My writing is doing well.
My boys seem to be done their major growth spurt for the time being.
Drama Girl finished a whole week of school without forgetting to turn in or bring home homework.
Hubby McRed is happy at his job, but stressed because he IS driven and an overachiever, and hasn't quite conquered a new territory yet.
I have a new modem so SHOULD be able to actually CONNECT to the internet.

Monday, August 20, 2007

Blogligent

That is me :)

I've been blogligent.

It's just that school starts early here, and so last week was spent doing last minute school shopping, a couple of days visiting the Manitou Cliff Dwellings (cool) Joe Buckskin Frontier Town or Something (kids loved it) and some caves.

I've also created a New Writing Commandment.
Thou Shalt Not Do Anything Til Thoust Hath Written 1,000 word or more.
This Includeth Dishes.

This actually works, except for today, but today was Drama Girl's first day back to school.

I celebrated this day by not doing my morning Wogging or Exercising, the dishes, or anything else that normally needs to be accomplished.

First day back to school for kid, Lounge goof off day for mom.

Never mind Turbo and Bear, they have been pesky all day, but haven't really noticed their sister is gone. Except for Turbo who is upstairs laying down with a particularly foul mood of unknown origin.

Hubby McRed suffered a flat tire today, so he has my truck. Which means even if I were inclined, I couldn't do any errands. Aw, shucks.

It's quickly turning into afternoon, however, so time to write those thousand words, do those dishes and discover the source of Turbo's foul mood.

Sunday, August 12, 2007

Turnips, your children will eat them

I happen to love turnips.

I know this isn't a common love, but I adore them.

How to get your children to adore them as much as you do?

Don't cook them turnips.

Cook them yellow and white mashed potatoes.

Boil turnips and potatoes, mash em like you would potatoes, and serve them like potatoes.

It's the same ole trick used with the cauliflower, only with turnips.

Now, if I could find a way to make rutabaga's appetizing, but frankly, I've never been fond of them myself!

Yes, I am inflicting a variety of palettes on my children in the hopes they will not be 'meat, potato, soda, chips, ice cream, candy eating American diet.'

Omigosh but tell me, WHY are my children addicted to their vitamin?

Thursday, August 09, 2007

Silent Me

I've been so busy!

But let me just pop in to reiterate one more time....


......


I am not going to learn how to play Bridge, because I'm not interested in playing Bridge, and while I would love a night out once a week, I would not love that night out once a week if it meant going to bridge class, in which case, I would rather stay home with a netflix video...

I'll be reading all my fave blogs soon!

Silent Me

I've been so busy!

But let me just pop in to reiterate one more time....


......


I am not going to learn how to play Bridge, because I'm not interested in playing Bridge, and while I would love a night out once a week, I would not love that night out once a week if it meant going to bridge class, in which case, I would rather stay home with a netflix video...

I'll be reading all my fave blogs soon!

Thursday, August 02, 2007

I got the scale

Okay,

For any who remotely care.

I finally got a scale, that measures body fat, too, oh joy...

The thing is, I've gone down a full size, and the new size I am is loose now. I'm not done dropping pounds and inches, but for the first time, I have a number. I KNEW I lost weight. I just didn't know how much. Oh my oh my oh my.

What it's been, three months, since I first made some small changes, and then noticed a lost inch?

Well,

Here it is.

I've lost..... FIFTEEN POUNDS!!!!! and about three or four inches, I honestly can't remember for certain what my waist was before.

That is a lot. I mean, Ten is hard to lose. I've lost five before. Everyone can lose five. Ten is dreadful. Everyone WANTS to lose ten. It's this golden number.

And I'm not done.

I'm not saying that as you are reading this, inches and pounds are dropping off at incredulous rates. I'm just saying that I'm doing really well in my exercising and eating, and hope to continue losing a pound a week. Yes, that's right, I only want to lose a pound a week. Two would be ideal, but one is more realistic. I have 15 more pounds to go. But really for me it's about the body fat and the size of clothing.

I'm THIIIIIISSSSSSSS close to my goal size which I want to be by fall. Then I want to spend the full winter going down the next size, because that is a hard one to hit. My goal is to achieve bathing suit hotness next summer. I know, it's a vanity, but whatever :).

I'm not going to write about this every day. It's dreary really, 'lost .3 lbs today...' lol no, we're not doing that. Especially since I'm trying to build muscle as well, so it's give and take. But I'll give you an occasional update :). Cuz I'm just so tickled pink with myself.

The thing is, I didn't do this with diet pills (which I'm totally against unless you REALLY are obese and need medical help to lose weight) or with weight watchers (the reason weight watchers doesn't work for me is because it doesn't change the way you eat, just how much, so yeah, frankly, for me, the sugary stuff had to go) and the places that prepackage your meals. Now, I think they are a great idea, the ones that ship you meals, so if you only eat what they send you, you lose weight, I think those are nice. I was tempted to try them before, but the only thing about them is they are expensive, they are processed, and if you don't learn to cook the healthy stuff and readjust your normal diet, as soon as you stop eating them, you end up reverting back to old weight gaining habits.

This isn't just about weight loss. This is about changing my lifestyle and my family's to be healthy, eat healthy, eat the right amounts, and to keep the weight off. My favorite side effect is my family has never eaten healthier. My boys, ate spinach! and cous cous! They only eat whole grain bread. I tricked them into fried tofu! Yes, they thought it was chicken, hey whatever works (I only do tofu once in a while, I'm still not sure if it's good for you or not ha ha). All our cereals are naturally under 6 grams of sugar. I got them eating quaker oats from the big container, rather than the instant sugared packets.

Mom and healthy meals, 1
Family and desirious junk, 0
Mommxxor for the Winxxor.

Oh and please, I think I mentioned, I don't believe that if you 'deprive your children' of super sugary treats and soda and cup cakes and twinkies, that they will go out and binge. I think that's an excuse. I believe in having healthy food in the house, including lots of yummy fruits to munch on, and letting them have cookies and stuff once in a while, and explaining why we don't have all the junk food in our house. No child wants to be fat, so if you appeal to the 'this is what makes you healthy and fit and looking good' they will continue with that trend. If one of them starts getting chunky I'm just going to readjust the diet and pipe up the exercise, but if you eat healthy, it's not usually an issue. So bleah.

And yes, this isn't just about me, it's about my children and my husband. And if my three year olds can be convinced that salmon is 'pink meat' and trout 'white chicken' and tofu 'chicken' then your kids can, too!

:)

oh and to ensure you all understand nothing is perfect, Drama Girl ate raw brown sugar at the coffee shop yesterday. /boggle....

I mean, okay she's ten. She was already sugared up from the fruit berry smoothie. I asked her to get me some brown sugar, and she got me a quarter cup.... /boggle... I meant the packets... and then she munched on the brown sugar before I saw what she was doing... so we had a little chat... I mean... that's the equivalent of one of those powdered sugar treats, remember those, you'd cut open the tip, open your mouth, and down all the sugar? Egads. She'd just have a cookie, too... so you see, it's ESSENTIAL we don't let kids make these decisions on their own... impulse always wins...