Sunday, December 14, 2014

Sunday thoughts

My story is in a snarl, so I'm letting it rest, but I want to get words on the page. Writing, writing, must always write... :)

I'm going to a Holiday Tea Party this afternoon at the home of one of the women who went to boot camp with me over the spring/summer. She had to stop going, but we've done a couple of non-workout events together. I'm going for five reasons:

1) Holiday Tea Party. I love tea parties. I'll be greatly disappointed if there is no tea.
2) I like the woman.
3) It's a small gathering - I do not usually enjoy large gatherings.
4) I am trying to be more social - I'm an introvert. Like many introverts, I can be socially awkward. That's an introvert thing, right? The thing is, I know that before I can spend time with anyone on a sort of closer level, in this case, actually going to their house, I need to know them first. I'm actually surprised she invited me. I figured I was too weird for her.
5) A couple of the other boot camp women are going, and I like them, too, because they are interesting characters with interesting lives. (Yes, I occasionally get fascinated by people, and then I have to hang around them to figure them out... it's a strange hobby, I know...)

Because blogs need pictures:

This grove is proof that magic is real. Fairies run in it,
disguised as squirrels.
I took this picture on a run yesterday. It's the grove behind my little ole lovely townhome. I ran yesterday because I knew today might be snowy, and while I will run in the winter, I won't run in a snowstorm unless desperate. It's Colorado, I can wait a day. Turned out it's not so snowy as melting flakes today.
I took the pictures because I love being out on the last days of a season, knowing the landscape can change overnight. I love a hike before the first cold day. A run before a snowfall. Being out the last days of winter.
I took this picture, and another, posted below, because as I was running by, sweet memories of earlier days and seasons flooded my mind, and I wondered at how many wonderful things have happened over the years. Yes. I wondered at. You can totally wonder at things.
I also took the photo because partly on the run, too many times, my mind kept drifting away where I didn't want it to go, just ruminations, we all have them. Those intrusive thoughts that keep us from being in the moment we are. What you could say, what might happen, whatever.

So, instead of being grumpy about it, and locking myself in this ridiculous rumination (alliteration!) I ran and did the 'state the obvious' game, my best escape from drifting mind syndrome. The pavement is clear. The creek is running low but fast. The air is cool but the wind is a cold sting.  My breath is perfect for this pace. The mountains have snow on them. I am running on the trail I've run for years. The dirt is packed hard. There are bicyclists. That's an old man with a long beard and long shorts.

Anyhoo, it works. It pulls me into this place where I'm thinking about what I'm doing, and then I'm running but more than that, I'm truly running and my mind is where I want it to be and I'm where I want it to be, and my mind is not making up absurd scenarios or stories in my head simply because it's trying to devise strategies for scenarios that never would happen in a gazillion years. That type of mind wandering is best left for my stories, and frankly, even then, my mind doesn't just go rambling. It presents a coherent vision.

Drifting minds, man... they suck. But my strategy works, as it always does, and the rest of the run was enjoyable. There's the large evergreen tree that holds a tiny cave. The artist faces used to be up here. There's the fish water bubbler and the red bench. The bridge under the path. The newly repaired bridge over the creek. My breath is awesome, one breath, three steps. Woot!

I know, I got the parking lot, but there's a lot of green behind it! When the boys
were toddlers, they played on this yellow set, and the swings. Such happiness.
Then, I turned the corner and passed the park the boys played at so many times, in the pool that's no longer there except for in memories. I remembered this one moment with the boys when they were toddlers and we had just moved here. I was going on a walk to explore a different park, and was pulling them in the red wagon, because it was too far for them to walk all the way to. I wore a rust colored dress that I loved. I had few friends, because we just moved here. (Okay, no friends..)  It's one of my favorite memories. I remember the sun, the heat, how happy we were together, seeing the mountains in the distance and noticing and being amazed by it as only someone new could.
Then I passed my friend's house and remembered when she was in a different house, even closer than the whole block away she moved. I remembered the friend who's off having a wonderful time in the Northwest and our trail runs and hikes. I remembered kids playing and adult badminton and my neighbor/friend who doesn't read my blog but whom I love anyway... and I wanted to take the pictures while I had the moment and the memory.

It was one of my best runs, though not my fastest...

It's why I love running. Most people run to lose weight, or to stay in shape. Or to do marathons and achieve things.

I think people who know me know that I run so I can stay in good enough shape to continue running.

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