There is something about timing. Timing is key. If you are a woman, it's vital you read this. It will solve your 'he won't 'place project he's slacking on here, this includes things he must fix but hasn't'... he said he would, four months ago...
Now, I admit, it involves more than just timing. It involves patience. Patience if he hasn't done the floors even though he bought them three weeks ago, patience if the wall isn't painted yet, patience... your moment will come... and he will suddenly decide to finish the project, thinking it's all his idea.
Now, there are things where the patience threshold has to be shortened. For example, garbage disposals. I was without a garbage disposal for a few days. It was awful. What did we ever do with like, cereal? Asparagus? Mushy food remains that would clog the drain? Then I remembered! We clogged the toilets by flushing them down there! So I didn't want to do that, and had to eww okay I used a colander to keep the mushy solids from going down the drain. Now, some people would say 'just fix it yourself' and I would have, except I didn't know how.
But I know two people who would know how. M. who fixed my last one, but lives in Virginia and is just being downright rude about not moving out here, something about family and kids and settling and crap. Excuses. I need someone to go shopping with. She's almost as bad as E. who refuses to move out here because she has a job and just bought a house and all that. Bah. Anyhow, my husband can fix it. He is really good at fixing things, and doing projects, when he does them. He is good at all sorts of handy man stuff, actually better than most, if I don't mind saying so, and clearly I don't... But he doesn't like doing them, so it takes forever. Thus the floors... So he agreed to try. I told him how to fix it via M.'s advice. He hit the reset button. This, of course, is not what she said to do, but it counted as effort. He said 'call a plumber.' Whatever. I KNEW he didn't do the right thing but couldn't remember what it was. Then M. called and I asked her. But he didn't want anything to do with fixing the garbage disposal. At all. I was going to, but then opportunity... He was in Do Things Mode. This mode, once it hits, it's a focused 'must get this done' type energy that regenererates until the project is done. I think every man hits this mode. It's not just my husband, or maybe it's just badgers. My husband is a badger, grumpy workers extraordinaiire... anyhow, over the years I realized that once in the throes of this inexhaustable energy, it's supereasily redirected. It's not totally focused like I used to believe. He wants to rearrange the downstairs room, and this energy, this "Do Things Mode" is turned on. But, it was lunch time and I made him come up for a sandwhich. Still in the midst of this energy, I simply pointed out how he could fix the garbage disposal, right now, while I was making his sandwhich, since he was already upstairs and M. just told me how to do it... and HE DID! Without even commenting, grumbling or trying to get out of it *he spent a great amount of energy explaining why he couldn't fix it, but I sooo know him better...*
See, it was timing. And this "Do Things Mode' is fairly common, you just have to be on the lookout for it. Any sudden interest in cleaning, something as small as you see your man stacking soda bottles neatly, or rounding up all the mail, or pulling out the vaccuum, he's in the mode... snag him and redirect him to the thing you really want done.... It takes practice...
The only problem is my badger is pretty intuitive himself, and an hour later, apparently figured it out, and whined to me about how he didn't understand how I got him to fix the garbage disposal and how he felt tricked... Well, I just reminded him that at least it's done and he doesn't need to fork out $300 just to have the stupid quarter that was stuck in there taken out...
Now, some of you are saying, what about the floors? He hasn't done them yet... No, but he will, and you know why? He secretly hates the turquoise carpet more than I do. So I'm patiently waiting... one night, soon, he will see the turquoise and break out in hives, and I will say 'well, this weekend is a light one for me, if we want to get those hives to go away, I can keep the kids off you so you can finish the floors...
MUAHAHAHA
Okay, maybe it's just that I'm evil....
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